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Most people leave or break up with their partners when they find out that they are cheating. Why do ‘cheaters’ apologize when they are found out? Is it just a natural response? If in deed you can justify why you cheated, why then do you end up apologizing for it instead of owning up to it and probably explain why you did it?

Cheating hurts the victims. They may feel betrayed, lied to and will most likely start stressing about it with questions like why? What’s wrong with me? Who is it? Endless questions that will only leave them heartbroken and devastated.

But why cheat? Everyone who has cheated will have their own reasons.

A partner who has found out that he or she was cheated on might cheat to get revenge. You might want your partner to go through the same emotions as you. However, this might not help in feeling better.


Some will cheat because they are bored. Partners who are always not available. It could be that they are busy with work or working abroad and other reasons that may cause their partners to feel attention deviated. This could be unconscious. Allow me to explain. You might not cheat on purpose. You could be lonely and there’s someone on your corner who is always there. An opportunity can present itself at any time.

The same passion and love that exists in the beginning of a relationship might fade away. This can prompt a partner to explore other options. Having other options is also another reason. Availability of other people who could be seeking you out. At one point this may excite you.


A partner might start desiring more sex, more affection and attention. If their partner doesn’t seem interested in adjusting to this needs, they might get attached to someone else who does and this consistency will likely lead to intimacy.

Some people cheat because it’s in their nature. This may sound like a lame excuse but no. Some people just can not get enough. They need variety to fulfill their desires. Most of the time they might feel that their needs are not being properly met, could be sexually, socially, financially and in other ways.

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Self esteem is another reason that might cause cheating. Constantly wanting validation. Having sex with many people might boost their self-esteem, they might end up feeling happier, more beautiful, wanted, sexier, confident. No matter how good their partners are, they will always seek other people just to feel better about themselves.

You have been really sad and down, you hate everything about your life. You go out to a club and this fine man or woman comes towards you and says, “Hallo gorgeous, you look stunning tonight”, Well, this can cause slip ups for some people.

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Some people cheat intentionally. They just want to end the relationship. Cheating can be the best or easiest way out.

Other people might cheat after heavy intoxication. A good night accompanied by ‘good company’, booze, flirting and all the characteristics sufficient to sway away any faithful person can be a trigger.

Working in environments that are distressing and emotionally draining could also trigger cheating. There will always be a person who takes on the responsibility to console you at the end of the day, they are closer than your partner. You might end up being emotionally drawn and attached to them. This relationships can potentially turn out to lunch dates, drinks out or dinner dates and one thing might lead to another.

Cheating is a choice.

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